My
mum Drene used to make the most divine lemon merangue pie. I say used to because
she has steadfastly refused to cook for anyone since Dad died in 1986. The
former Doreen Kirk metamorphasised as the star of silverscreen and dance floor
Drene Kirk in her teenage years, and of course not forgetting Miss Pit Top 1946.
"I'm Doreen no more, I hate it, my sisters can stay Gladys and Cynthia but
I've got my pride - you must all call me Drene".
My Grandad continued to call her "Our Dot", but the family members
acquiesced, well most, the Yorkshire relatives stuck with Doreen, as was, and
rightly so, "we'll not put up with that shenanigan up here". Drene and
her sisters joined the Land Army and did their patriotic duty through farm work
during the day and dancing the feet off the Allies at night.
Drene
met my dad Saint John McGloin, latterly of Bells Hill Scotland, but removed
through seminary to Mill Hill, Kent, when he sported an RAAF uniform over the
saint's garb. After a dance or three she invited him home for the lemon meringue
pie - a sure fire never fail winner. And sooner or later that's
where I came in. She maintains that it was not a Kirk recipe and that it was a
packet mix but her memory is somewhat selective these days and besides I can't
allow myself to believe that my rapture was achieved by Mrs Craddock's packet
of powder. Anyway she had a rhyme celebrating the virtues of her pie:
MY PIE BY DRENE
Some'll
make goosegog
Some'll
make an apple
Mine
is a meringue
An'
it's summat special
El
merin-gue pie
Hot'n
from the oven
Puts
a smile on't dial
If
you feel downtrodden
It'll
banish all despair
Flattening
your bunions
Sweetening
your breath
After
scoffing onions
Smooth
away your warts
An'
chase a hoary devil
Starting
up your car
If
your battery's buggered [so what smartie - up yours too !!!]
It'll
ward off Mormons
Wicked
witch's whispers
Droopy
dripping dogs
And
old Prime Min'sters
It'll
shout at loonies
While
unblocking drains
Appeasing
the saints
And
apportioning blame
Take
you up to Heaven
To
have a quick geek
Before
you sign a lease
On
Celestial Street
A
pie is just a pie?
Some
might say that
Mine's
a meringue
Not
yer common crap
So,
I've test driven a number of lemon meringue recipes, hundreds in fact and the
one which most closely approximates Drene's heavenly offering is as follows:
1.75
cups caster sugar
4
tbls cornflour
1/2
tsp salt
4
tbls all-purpose flour
2
cups boiling water
4
large eggs separated
2
tbls butter
1/3
cup fresh lemon juice
grated
lemon rind of 2 lemons
1/4
tsp cream of tartar
1/2
tsp vanilla extract
sheet
of pastry
Place
a sheet of pastry in a pie or casserole dish and bake according to instructions.
Combine
1.25 cups sugar, cornflour, salt and flour in saucepan and gradually pour in the
boiling water while stirring. Place over medium heat and cook for ten mins while
stirring. The mixture will thicken. Squash any lumps.
Slightly
beat egg yokes and whisk in a small amount of the mixture. Mix it well and pour
this yolk mix back into a saucepan. Cook over low heat while stirring for a
couple of mins. Remove pan from heat and stir in butter, lemon juice and rind.
Set aside to cool.
Preheat
oven to 220c. Beat egg whites with cream of tartar until light and frothy.
Gradually add remaining caster sugar and vanilla while beating. When stiff peaks
form you have it, El meringue.
Shiela
Ferguson in her great book on Southern US cuisine "Soul Food" gives her tip
at this point and suggests that you put 4 tablespoons of meringue into the lemon
mix to make lighten the filling and make it fluffy.
Spoon
the lemon mix into the pie dish and spoon the meringue on top from centre
outwards. Make the fluffy mountain peaks, you artist you.
Bake
for about 6 mins then check to ensure the meringue isn’t burning. It needs to
be rich sugary brown on the peaks. Alternatively place under the gorilla,
Camilla, and watch the flotilla.
Let
it cool slightly and serve with confidence, and a degree of smug satisfaction.